Fox Into a Bulldog

Q: How do you turn a fox into a bulldog?
A: Marry her.

Cards at the Colonel's

Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel's home for an evening of bridge. The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel's wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar. When the sound of splashing echoed through the family room, his wife was greatly embarrassed and attempted to apologize, to which the Colonel's wife smiled demurely, "Don't worry about it; this is the first time all evening that I've been able to tell what he has in his hand."

Know When To Be Mute

Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.