Relationship Jokes

Shots Fired

Two police officers responding to a domestic disturbance with shots fired arrive on scene.  After discovering the wife had shot her husband for walking across her freshly mopped floor,  they called their sergeant for advice on his cell phone. 
  
 "Hello Sarge.”      "Yes.” 
 "It looks like we have a homicide here. “
 "What happened?”
 "A woman shot her husband for walking on the wet floor she had just mopped.” 
 "Have you placed her under arrest?”
 "No sir.  The floor is still wet."

Anonymous

Gatting to Know Her

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in most countries, son.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

The Irish Driver

An Irishman who had a little to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over... "So," says the cop to the driver, "where have you been?" "Why, I've been to the pub of course" slurs the drunk. "Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening." "I did all right," the drunk says with a smile. "Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?" "Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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