Mexicans at the Alamo

Q: Why did only 1,800 Mexicans show up to the Battle of the Alamo?
A: They only had two vans!

Mexican Acronym

A cowboy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks for a shot. Across the bar, a Mexican man is sitting and glaring at the cowboy. The cowboy takes the shot and slams the shot glass down on the counter, yelling, "TGIF!" The Mexican orders a shot, takes it, and slams his glass down, yelling, "SPIT!" The cowboy looks over at him and notices the Mexican guy is still staring at him. The cowboy once again orders a shot, slams it down, and yells again "TGIF!" Once again, the Mexican orders a shot, slams it down after consuming it, and yells out, "SPIT!" This goes on for a while, and the bartender stands puzzled and annoyed. Finally, the bartender asks the cowboy, "Just checking, but do you know what TGIF means?" and the cowboy replies, "Hell ya I know what it means, 'Thank God It's Friday!'" The bartender asks the Mexican guy, "Okay, so what does 'SPIT' mean?" and the Mexican replies, "Stupid Pendejo It's Thursday!"

I'll Have a Coke

So there's a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican. They find a genie's lamp, they rub it, and poof appears the genie! The genie goes to the black guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" The black guy goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be back in Africa, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted. Then, the genie goes to the Mexican and asks, "What's your one wish?" The Mexican goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be in Mexico, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted. Now, the genie goes over to the white guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" and the white guy asks, "You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people are out of America?" The genie replies, "Yes." So the white guy goes, "Then I'll have a Coke."