Intel Inside

Q: What do computers snack on when they're hungry?
A: Chips!

Jump Out of the Plane

An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says, "We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump. At least one of you will survive."  The four open the door and look out below.  The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers, "God Save The Queen," and jumps.  The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers, "Viva La France," and he also jumps.  This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers, "Remember the Alamo," and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

High Tea with Dad

A little girl is serving her father tea while her mother is out shopping. The mother comes home and the father says, "Watch this!" The little girl goes and serves the mother tea. The mother turns to the father and says, "Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?"