Elephants

Every nation has to write a book about the Elephant...

 
The French book - The Sex Life of the Elephant (or 1000 ways to cook Elephant)
The English book - Elephants I Have Shot on Safari
The Welsh book - The Elephant and its Influence on Welsh language and Culture (or: Oes Ysgol Tocynnau Eleffant Llanfairpwll Nhadau Coeden)
The American book - How to Make Bigger And Better Elephants
The Japanese book - How to Make Smaller And Cheaper Elephants
The Greek book - How to Sell Elephants for a Lot of Money
The Finnish book - What Do Elephants Think About Finnish People
The German book - A Short Introduction to Elephants, Vol 1-6.
The Icelandic book - Defrosting an Elephant
The Swiss book - Switzerland: The Country Through Which Hannibal Went With His Elephants
The Canadian book - Elephants: A Federal or State Issue?
The Swedish book - How to Reduce Your Taxes With an Elephant.

Great Dane

A man goes to a bar and he ties his Great Dane up outside. About 10 minutes later a lady comes in and asks who's Great Dane is outside. "Mine" says the man. "My dog has just killed him," she says. "What breed is your dog?" he asks. "A Chihuahua," she says. "How can a Chihuahua kill a Great Dane?" "He got caught in his throat!"

Bear Hunt

Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it, but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, so he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast, but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another!"