Obama Impresses

Obama is sitting in a hotel lobby, planning his speech to a group of businessmen, when a man approaches him. "Excuse me, Mr. President, but my name is John Webber, and I'm here with an extremely important client. We're going to see your speech tonight, and it would be a great help to me if when we walk by, you could impress him by saying, 'Hello, John'." Obama readily agrees, and fifteen minutes later, the man walks by, deep in conversation with his client. Obama waves and says, "Hello, John!" The man replies, "Buzz off, Obama! I'm in a meeting," and keeps walking.

Obama Coffee -Riddles

Q: Do you know what Obama Coffee is?
A: Black and weak.

Biden Iraqi Advice

Q: What advice did Joe Biden give to the Iraqi PM after the Carter remarks?
A: Get one of the Benelli shotguns we sent you, fire two shots in the air.  Those ISIS bastards will run for the hills.