Santa's Reindeer

Q: How many reindeer does Santa have?
A: 11 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Rudolph, Olive (all of the other reindeer) and Al (Then Al the reindeer loved him)

Paddy and Shaun

It's Christmas time and Paddy and Shaun decided to go look for a Christmas Tree. They gathered their axe, a sled, and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them. When they finally reach a fine stand of trees, Shaun brushes off the first tree, and stands back with Paddy to look at it. "Well, Paddy, What do you think?"  "Sorry, Shaun, this tree won't do. Let's try another one."  They come upon another nice tree, Shaun brushes it off, and they both look at it.  "How about this one, Paddy?"  "Not quite, Shaun. Let's keep looking." This goes on until nightfall.  Both Paddy and Shaun are cold, tired, and hungry. "Well, Paddy, what do we do now?"  "Shaun, I think we should take home the next tree we find, whether it has lights on it or not...!"

Cristmas Quiz

• If athletes get athlete's foot, astronauts get missile toe.
• A bird dog could be called a point setter.
• James Fenimore Cooper wrote about the life of Santa Claus in his novel The Deer Sleigher.
• Q: What's the difference between a one-winged angel and a two-winged angel? A: It's a matter of a pinion!
• It's a matter of my opinion that Yule love the game we're about to play.

In each sentence below, fill in the blank or blanks with an expression commonly used at Christmas time. Answers repose at the end of this column.
1. On December 24, Adam's wife was known as _____ _____.
2. In Charles Dickens's A Christmas Carol, Scrooge was visited by the ghost of _____ _____.
3. An opinion survey in Alaska is called a _____ _____.
4. What does Santa Claus do with his three gardens? _____, _____, _____
5. What Christmas message is conveyed by these letters?: ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ. _____, _____
6. When the salt and the pepper say "Hi!" to each other, they are passing on _____ _____.
7. A holy man bereft of change could be called _____ _____.
8. When you cross a sheep with a cicada, you get a _____ _____.
9. A quiet medieval armor-wearer is a _____ _____.
10. A cat walking on the desert is bound to get _____ _____.
11. People who tell jokes on December 25 might be called _____ _____.
12. An airplane disaster in Israel is a _____.
13. Actor O'Connor and actress Channing are known on December 25 as _____ _____.
14. What do Spanish sheep says when they wish each other a Merry Christmas? _____ _____.
Meretricious to all! And don't forget that There's No Plate Like Chrome for the Hollandaise.
 
Answers
1. Christmas Eve
2. Christmas Present
3. North Poll
4. Hoe, hoe, hoe.
5. Noel,(no L)
6. seasons' greetings.
7. St. Nickleless.
8. Bah! (or Baa!) Humbug!
9. silent knight
10. sandy claws
11. Christmas cards
12. cresh
13. Christmas Carols
14. Fleece Navidad!