Redneck Walk

You might be a redneck if...
You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree to relieve yourselves.

Curing a Cough

The owner of a drugstore arrives at work to find a man leaning heavily against a wall. The owner goes inside and asks his clerk what’s up. "He wanted something for his cough, but I couldn’t find the cough syrup," the clerk explains. "So I gave him a laxative and told him to take it all at once." "Laxatives won’t cure a cough, you idiot," the owner shouts angrily. "Sure it will," the clerk says, pointing at the man leaning on the wall. "Look at him. He’s afraid to cough."

Long, Black and Smelly

Q: What is long, black, and smelly?
A:  The unemployment line.