Two Caged Canaries

Once upon a time there were two canaries in a cage. Naturally, one was male and the other female. After many months, the male decided to meet the female. So he scooted over to her side of the cage and said, "Since we're in this together, why don't I move over to your side of the cage!" The female canary replied, "No, thanks!!" So he went back to his side but found he could stay there no longer. Once again, he moved to her side of the cage. This time he asked, "I am sorry I was to forward the first time. Why don't we get to know each other first." To which she replied again, "No, thanks!" Resigning himself to return to his side of the cage, he languished about for a bit then made one final effort. He went halfway across the cage and stated, "Well, could we at least talk?" This time she replied, "Oh, I am so sorry I have been so mean. You see I just learned I have a canarial disease called, "Chirpies' and I hear it is untweetable."

Tricky

Say toast 2 times fast, then spell it 2 times, then say it 3 times, then spell it once. Now, what do you put in a toaster?

Sweet Strategy

I've developed a foolproof way of getting maximum candy this Halloween. Dress as a Jehovah's Witness and say "Do you have a few minutes to talk about God or treat"