Hard Egg

Two eggs were kissing on a bed when the female egg said, "I have to go change. I'll be back in a minute." Five minutes later, the the female egg walked out in a slinky 'egg'lige, rubbing her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body. Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely. "What are you doing?" the female egg asked. He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon."

Good Place To Eat

Have you ever walked up to a really fat person, and asked them for a good place to eat? Then when they look at you and say they don't know, you look at them, like, "You do know. I bet if I follow you for an hour, we're going to be eating."

Turkey's Favorite Song

Q: What's a turkey's favorite song?
A: "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas"