Jokes about Families - Son Jokes

Shark Week - Father Knows Best

Two great white sharks swimming in the ocean spied survivors of a sinking ship. " Follow me son," the father shark said and they swam to the mass of people. " First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing " And they did. " Well done, son!  Now we swim around them a few times with all of our fins showing " And they did. " Now we eat everybody." And they did. When they were both gorged, the son asked, "Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first? Why did we swim around and around them?" His wise father replied, "Because they taste better if you scare the shit out of them first!"

Anonymous

Perfect

Little Johnny walked in one day on his daddy in the bathroom. He asked his father what that was hanging between his legs. His father replied that it was the perfect penis. The next day at school, Johnny pulled his pants down in front of his classmates.
''What's that?'' asked Jenny.
''Well,'' said Johnny, ''if it was about 3 inches smaller, it would be the perfect penis.'''

Anonymous

Farmer's Boys

A farmer had three sons. One day his oldest came to him and said that since he was graduating from high school, he would really like to get a car. His father said, "Son, come here." He took him to the barn and pointed to the tractor and said, "This tractor is needed for the farm and I promise, as soon as it's paid for, we'll get you a car." The boy was not too happy, but was understanding. A week later, his second son approached him wanting a motorcycle. "Well", the father said, "as soon as the tractor is paid for we'll see about getting you your scooter. "Shortly after, his youngest was bugging him for a bike. Again, the father gave him the lecture about the tractor needing to be paid off first. While leaving the barn, the young boy, a little disgusted with his father's explanation, saw the farm rooster doing it's rooster duty with one of the hens. He promptly went over and kicked the rooster off the hen's back, mumbling to himself. His dad asked, "Son, now why would you do something like that? He didn't do anything to deserve that." The third son replied, "Hey, nobody around here rides anything until that tractor gets paid off!"

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