Grillin' with Dad

One day when I was young I watched my father grill burgers. When they were done, he handed me one, telling me it was a Bison burger. He then left and never came back. I know he may not have been dedicated to his family, but he was dedicated to his jokes.

Confused Egyptian Boy

Q: Why was the Egyptian boy confused?
A: His daddy was really a mummy.

You Might Be A Redneck 53

You might be a redneck if...

• You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.
• You're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.
• You don't think Jeff's jokes are funny.
• Your house has a kickstand.
• You drive around a parking lot for fun.
• Your girlfriend has ever called YOUR parents "Ma and Pa".
• You have to duct tape your gloves on.
• You've ever pruned your trees with a shotgun.
• Someone says they spotted Bigfoot and you go buy tickets to the tractor pull.
• You think that Marlboro is a cologne.