New Language Courses in Ameirca

New languages being taught in America:

• Afro-American Speak -- Ebonics (or We-Beonics)
• Irish-American Speak -- Leprechaunics
• Native-American Speak -- Kimosabics
• Italio-American Speak -- Spumonics (or Rigatonics)
• Chinese-American Speak -- Won-tonics
• Japanese-American Speak -- Mama-san-ics
• Polish-American Speak -- Kielbasanics
• Jewish-American Speak -- Zionics
• Russian-American Speak -- Rasputonics
• Spanish-American Speak -- Flan-ics
• Scottish-American Speak -- Tartan-ics
• Eskimo-American Speak -- Harpoonics
• German-American Speak -- Autobaunics (or Teutonics)
• Canadian-American Speak -- EH?onics
• Florida Democratic Voters Speak -- Moronics

Irish Assault and Battery

In hearing an Irish case of assault and battery, counsel, in cross examining one of the witnesses, asked him what they had the first place they stopped at. "Four glasses of ale," was the reply. "Next?" "Two glasses of whiskey." "Next?" "One glass of brandy." "Next?" "A fight."

Brave With Chief's Daughter

There was a brave with no sexual experience. He went to the chief and asked to meet one of his daughters. The chief said, ''No, you first must go into the forrest and practice on the trees.'' The little brave did as he was told. After several days, the brave returned and asked again, ''Chief, can I meet with one of your daughters?'' ''Why sure you can, young brave,'' said the chief.
So, after a little foreplay with the chief's daughter, the little brave undressed her. Before going any further, he turned around, grabbed a stick, and started pushing it in and out of her. ''What do you think you're doing?'' she screamed. ''Checking for bees,'' he replied.