Indian Om Tone

(Strong east Indian accent:) Hello, you have reached the existential hotline of Ransheesh. I am currently meditating, but if you leave your name and which lifeline you are currently inhabiting at the sound of the Om, I will send good karma waves and contact you when the stars align properly.

Wrong Operation

One Polish surgeon asks another: "How did that appendectomy go?" "Appendectomy?" shrieks the other. "I though it was an autopsy!"

Switzerland Perks

Q: What are some of the perks of living in Switzerland?
A: Well, the flag's a big plus.