Breeding Problem

A Soviet woman comes to a gynecologist and complains: "Doctor, when I wasn't married, I had six abortions, and now that I'm married I can't get pregnant." "Well" said the doctor, "It's possible you don't breed in captivity!"

Baby Soon

A pregnant woman hobbles into the hospital, one hand on her back. A nurse asks her what’s wrong, and the pregnant woman screams, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Didn’t!” The nurse shakes her head and says, “I’m sorry…I don’t understand.” The pregnant woman’s face contorts in pain as she shouts, “Can’t! Won’t! Don’t!” The nurse, bewildered, turns to a doctor. “Admit her,” the doctor said. “She’s having contractions.”

Czechoslovakian Abortion

Q: What do you call an abortion in Czechoslovakia?
A: A cancelled Czech!