Constipated Polack

A Polack was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories. A week later the Pole complained to the doctor that they didn't produce the desired results. "Have you been taking them regularly?" the doctor asked. "What do you think I've been doing," the Pole said, "Shoving them up my ass?"

Constipation Problem

Old Aunt Dora went to her doctor to see what could be done about her constipation.
"It's terrible," she said, "I haven't moved my bowels in a week."
"I see. Have you done anything about it?" asked the doctor.
"Naturally," she replied, "I sit in the bathroom for a half- hour in the morning and again at night."
"No," the doctor said, "I mean do you take anything?" 
"Naturally," she answered, "I take a book."

Dad and Daughter Doctor Check Up

An old man and his daughter go to the doctor for his monthly checkup. During examination, the doctor asks how his nightly incontinence is. "It's fine," says the old man. "I just get up and go to the bathroom, and God turns on the light for me." The doctor finishes up the examination, and then calls in the daughter to tell her about the God-light thing. "Oh, my God!" says the daughter. "He's been using the fridge again!"