Guide Dogs Only

Why do shops have signs that say "guide dogs only"?  The dogs can't read and their owners are blind?

Where Do You Work

A guy walks up to a one legged lady and said hey where do you work? The lady says iHop. The guy says no not how you get to work, where you work?

Summer Bible Salesman

Three boys look for a summer job. Their preacher agrees to let them sell Bibles door to door, though he's hesitant about hiring the third boy because he suffers from a speech impediment. After the first week of work they all meet at the church. The preacher asks the boys, "How many Bibles did you sell?" The first boy says, "35." The second boy says, "75." The boy with the speech impediment says, "I-I-I s-s-sold 175." The preacher is amazed and asks the boy how he did it. The boy says, "I-I-I t-t-told them to b-b-buy t-t-them, or I'd r-r-read it to t-t-them."