Dark Humor Jokes - Death Jokes

Turkey Shoping

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

Categories: Animal Jokes (Bird Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Food Jokes (Meat-eater Jokes) , Holiday Jokes (Thanksgiving Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Bar Window

Two guys are sitting in a fourth story bar drinking. The first guy stands up and says, "I'm done," and walks to the window, jumps out, then blows right back in. He says, "I knew it, the draft was too strong," and he sits back down.
A few minutes later, the other guy says, "I'm done," and jumps out the window and falls to his death. The bartender turns to the first guy and says, "Superman, you sure are an asshole when you're drunk!"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Bar Trick Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Submitted BY: bizzyb05

Prescription

A woman walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic. He asks "What for?" She says, "I want to kill my husband." He says "Sorry, I can't do that." She then reaches into her handbag a pulls out a photo of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife and hands it to him. He says, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription..."

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Drug Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Pharmacist Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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