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Animal Jokes - Insect Jokes
Turned Into An Insect
Q: What happened to the man who turned into an insect?
A: He just beetled off!
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Elephant and a Flea
Q: What is the difference between an elephant and a flea?
A: An elephant can have fleas but a flea can't have elephants!
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Elephant Jokes Again
Q: Why do elephants have trunks?
A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.
Q: What do you do when you come across an elephant?
A: Wipe it off!
Q: Have you heard about Hannibal crossing the Alps with elephants?
A: None of the offspring survived.
Q: How does the male elephant find the female elephant when she's lying down in tall grass?
A: VERY attractive.
Q: How do you know when an elephant has been screwing in you're yard?
A: The flower beds are crushed and you are missing a garbage bag!
Q: What did the elephant say when he saw a dead ant on the road? A: Deadant! Deadant! Deadant!!! (to be sung).
Q: What did he say when he saw a live ant on the road?
A: He stamped it to death and then said "Deadant! Deadant! Deadant!!!".
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a grape?
A: Cosine (Theta) Note: Assumes |elephant| |grape| 1
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a mountain climber?
A: Zero - a mountain climber is a scaler.
Q: What do you give a seasick elephant?
A: Lots of room.
Q: What's grey and comes in quarts?
A: An elephant.
Q: What do you do if an elephant comes through your window?
A: Swim for your life!!
Q: Why do elephants lay on their backs?
A: To trip low flying canaries.
Q: Why did the elephant have a yellow spot on his ass?
A: He wasn't laying on his back.
Q: Why do elephants have Big Ears?
A: Because Noddy won't pay the ransom. (Noddy is children's storybook character)
Q: Why don't you go into the jungle between 3 and 4 am?
A: Because the elephants are jumping from the trees.
Q: Why are pygmies so short?
A: Because they go into the jungle between 3 and 4 am.
Q: Whats that red stuff between elephants toes?
A: Slow pygmies.
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