Chicken and a Bell

Q: What do you get if you cross a chicken with a bell?
A: A bird that has to wring its own neck!

Funny Bird

Q: What's the funniest bird?
A: The owl, because it's a HOOT

Parrot Talk

One day a guy walked into a pet store to buy a parrot. He found one that he liked and went up to the counter to buy it. The store clerk saw which parrot he had picked out and said, "That parrot repeats everything he hears." "That's alright,'' the man replied. So the man bought the parrot and left the store. As he was walking down the street, he saw a cop chasing a robber. The cop hollered to his partner, ''Shoot him down, shoot him down!'' Then the parrot said, ''Shoot him down, shoot him down!'' They kept walking and found a man who was trying to pry his car off the ground with a crowbar because his wheels had been stolen. The man said, ''Pop it up, pop it up!'' The parrot said, ''Pop it up, pop it up!'' They kept on walking to a carnival. A guy at a game stand yelled, ''Hit a big one, win a prize!'' The parrot said, ''Hit a big one, win a prize!'' Then they walked into a church and sat down. The minister was in the middle of the sermon. He said, ''The Lord is above us.'' The parrot said, ''Shoot him down,shoot him down!'' The minister said, ''The devil is below us.'' The parrot said, ''Pop it up, pop it up.'' Then the minister got angry and threw a bible at the parrot. The parrot ducked and the bible hit a fat lady behind him. The parrot said, ''Hit a big one, win a prize!''