Mouse Tail Gunner

An Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ft. when he spies a field mouse down below him. He dives down and eats the mouse. After a little while the mouse works his way out the eagles butt. Proceeding to look around the mouse says: "Tail gunner to pilot... Tail gunner to pilot.." The eagle says "what do you want?" The mouse asks how high up they are. The eagle thinks for a moment and then says "ohh about 5,000 ft." The mouse then replies "You wouldn't be shittin me now would ya??"

My Rooster, Your Donkey

Q: If I have a rooster and you have a donkey, and your donkey bites off my rooster's feet, what do you have?
A: Two feet of my cock in your ass.

Collector

We've been reading in the papers lately about terrible cruelty someone is causing to our winged friends by the shore, as many Pelicans have been found with their beaks cut off. Police suspect a local bill collector is behind it all.