Profession Jokes

Taxidermy Thanksgiving

Q: What is a taxidermist's favorite part of Thanksgiving?
A: The stuffing.

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Anonymous

Writers' Quotes

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
Tom Clancy: "I never know what I think about something until I read what I've written on it.
William Faulkner: "I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87."
Steve Martin: "I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know."
Mel Brooks: "It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."
Robert Benchley: "A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction."

Categories: Profession Jokes
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Anonymous

Flying Pill

A man went into a bar in a high rise. He saw another man take a pill, take a drink, walk to the window and jump out. He flew around for a minute and zipped back into the bar. As the amazed newcomer watched, the man repeated this twice more. Finally the man asked if he could have a pill. The flier said it was his last one. The man offered five hundred dollars to no avail, so he made a final offer of a thousand dollars. The man said that it was all he had on him. The flier reluctantly gave in, took the cash, surrendered the pill, and turned back to the bar. The man took the pill, took a drink, went to the window, and jumped out only to fall to his death. The bartender walked over to the flier at the bar and, wiping a glass, said, "You sure are mean when you're drunk, Superman."

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