Cure For Unemployment

"So you think you could end all unemployment, do you?" asked the interviewer. "And how, if I may be so bold to inquire?" "Why, I'd put all the men on one island and all the women on another." replied Paddy. "And what would they be doing then?" "Building boats!"

Wood Smelling Nose

Two brothers, Bob and Tom, both work for a lumberyard. One day, Bob tells Tom that he can tell what any piece of wood is just by smelling it. Unbelieving, Tom blindfolds Bob and proceeds to test the theory. The first piece of wood Bob smells, he instantly identifies as maple. The second piece Bob instantly identifies as walnut. Tom cannot believe Bob can really do this, so he takes an old piece of wood and whispers to the secretary to rub the wood between her legs. She happily runs it up in her crotch. Tom hands the piece of wood to Bob. Bob smells it three times.
''I am stumped. But I would have to guess that this wood is either a pussywillow or a shingle from a shithouse.''

Corporate Booty Call - Spreadsheet

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