A Water Overdose

A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor of twenty years. They had the following conversation "Take the red pill after breakfast with one glass of water."
"Ok."
"Take the blue pill after lunch with two glasses of water."
"Ok."
"Take the yellow pill after dinner with three glasses of water." After giving these instructions to the woman, she asks,
"Can you tell me what's wrong with me Dr.?"
"Yeah. You do not drink enough water."

No Pressure

This older Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes Dad, what is it?"
"Don't be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me ... your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife...."

Bee Sting

A woman has just started to play golf when she gets stung on the arm by a bee. She rushes back to the clubhouse, hoping to find a doctor. She asks, "Is anyone here a doctor." One guy, who was pretty drunk, stands up and says, "I'm a doctor, what can I help you with?" "I've been stung by a bee." "Oh really, where?" "Between the first and second hole" "Well, first of all, your stance is too wide..."