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Profession Jokes - Other Doctor Jokes
Duck Tails
Three doctors are in a duck blind and a bird flies overhead. The general practitioner looks at it and says, "Looks like a duck, flies like a duck... it's probably a duck," and shoots at it but misses and the bird flies away.
The next bird flies overhead and the pathologist looks at it, then looks through the pages of a bird manual, and says, "Hmmmm...green wings, yellow bill, quacking sound...might be a duck." He raises his gun to shoot it, but the bird is long gone.
A third bird flies over. The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking, brings the bird down, and turns to the pathologist and says, "Go see if that was a duck."
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Bad News V Good News
Doctor: I have some good news and I have some bad news, which shall I tell first?
Patient: Do begin with the bad news, please.
Doctor: Alright. Your son has drowned, your daughter has been raped, your wife has divorced you, your house got blown away, and you have AIDS.
Patient: Good grief! What's the good news?
Doctor: The good news is that there is no more bad news.
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Midget Visits the Doctor
A midget walks into the doctors and says, "Doc, I've got these fucking itchy balls and I can't do anything to stop 'em itching." The Doc says, "I can see the problem and I'll fix it for ya." So the Doc pulls out a pair of scissors and tells the Midget to close his eyes. The midget hears snip, snip snip noises for about 5 minutes. The doc finishes and says, "How's that?" The midget says, "Fucking brilliant, what did you do?" The Doc says, "I trimmed back your high boots."
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