Too Much Sex

One day a man took his wife to the doctor and says, "All she likes to do is do it. Can you help her?" The doctor replies, "Come back in an hour." The man leaves so the doctor can perform his treatment. One hour later the man returns to discover the doctor having sex with his wife. The man says, "What are you doing?!?" The doctor says, "Taking her temperature." The man replies, "When you pull that thing out it better have some numbers on it!"

Alaskan Eyes

Q: Why can't you see an eye-doctor on an Alaskan island?
A: They all turn out to be an optical Aleutian.

Aids or Alzheimers?

A guy takes his ill and aging wife in to the doctor's office. After a full examination, the doc tells the guy it's one of two things. The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimer's disease or AIDS." "What do you mean!" The guy says, "Can't you tell the difference?" "Well, says the Doc, the two look a lot alike in the early stages. Tell you what ya do. Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, don't have sex with her anymore!"