The Dotted Line

Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet? "Why are we running so fast?" said one.  Because it says "Tear along the dotted line"

Bad Advice

Before the fight, Mike's trainer told him to get a piece of Holyfied. Oops, bad advice.

Blighted Family Tree

A tree in our yard was terribly bothered by blight. We sought professional help and had a tree surgeon come to look at it. In his assessment, he noted that the blight was bad, but he was even more concerned with the deep cracks in the bark.
"In fact," he said, "This tree's bark is worse than its blight!"