Student Bloopers - Part I

This is a collection of actual student bloopers collected by teachers from 8th grade through college.

• Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics.
• They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot.
• The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.
• The Bible is full of interesting caricatures.
• In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.
• One of their children, Cain, asked, "Am I my brother's son?"
• Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients.
• Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments.
• He died before he ever reached Canada.
• The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't have history.
• The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth.
• Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him.
• Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.
• In the Olympic games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits, and threw the java.
• Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul.
• The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: "Tee hee, Brutus."
• Another story was William Tell, who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his son's head.
• Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted, "hurrah."
• It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood.
• Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking.
• And Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper.

Ghost Dessert

Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert? 
A: I Scream.

Bush and Clinton in Common

Q: What do President Bush and President Clinton have in common?
A: They both let Dick do the thinking.