New Password

I changed my password to "incorrect" 
Now when I type it wrong my computer will tell me "your password is incorrect"

Waist

Q: Why is the section of body between a woman's breasts and her crotch called a waist?
A: You could fit another pair of breasts there...

Recruting

I received a call from a Headhunter. She said to me, "Sir, I have two openings for you!"
I replied, "Yes. I know."
There was a long silence and then she said, "Asshole."
I replied, "I prefer the other one."