Is a Lawyer Well Hung?

Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!

Did You Kill the Victim?

Prosecutor:  Did you kill the victim?
Defendant:  No Sir, I did not.
Prosecutor:  Do you know what the penalties are for perjury?
Defendant: Yes Sir, I do. And they're a heck of a lot better than the penalty for murder!

Tough Court Case

A tough case was being argued in court. The defense attorney, feeling that he was in trouble, sent the judge a bottle of hundred-year old brandy. The defendant was fit to be tied.
"The judge will kill me, he ill think you are trying to bribe him! We're dead!" cried the defendant.
"I don't think so," his attorney told him. "I sent it in the other lawyer's name!"