Washington Crazy Law

• It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
• All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle. 
• People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
• You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
• All lollipops are banned.
• You are breaking the law if you sell or place in the stream of commerce a crib that has: corner posts that extend more than 1/16-inch above end panels; slats more than 2 3/8 inches apart; a mattress support that releases easily from corner posts; cutout designs on the end panels; tears in mesh or fabric; missing or loose screws, bolts, or hardware; sharp edges, points, or rough surfaces on wood surfaces that are not smooth and free from splinters, splits or cracks.
• The new Infant Crib Safety Act in California (AB 3760, Speier), Colorado (SB 98-023,Pascoe and Morrison) and Washington State (SSB 6229, Kohl and Pennington) states that "no commercial user shall manufacture, retrofit, sell, contract to sell or resell, lease, sublet or otherwise place in the stream of commerce, a full-size or non-full-size crib that is unsafe for any infant using the crib.
• It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
• You are not allowed to breast feed in public.
• When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
• A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
• Auburn - Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.
• Bremerton - You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
• Everett - It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
• Lynden - Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
• Seattle - You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
• No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission.
• It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
• Spokane - TV's may not be bought on Sundays.
• Waldron Island - No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing. - San Juan County Ordinance NO. 7 -1995 (Passed June 7,1995)
• Wilbur - You may not ride an ugly horse. 

Wisconsin Defined and Laws

Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese
Wisconsin: Eat Cheese or Die or Come Cut Our Cheese
Wisconsin: Land of funny accents.
Dumb Wisconsin Laws: 

• You must manually flush all urinals in a building.
• Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
• Citizens may not murder their enemies.
• Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
• At one time, margarine was illegal.
• State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
• While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license.
• It is illegal to kiss on a train.
• It is illegal to cut a woman's hair.
• Car dealerships cannot sell cars on Sunday.
• Kenosha - No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.
• La Crosse - It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip).
• It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
• It is illegal to play checkers in public.
• You cannot "worry a squirrel."
• Milwaukee - An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car.
• It is against the law to play a flute and drums on the streets to attract attention.
• If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day.
• It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.
• Racine - It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
• Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.
• St. Croix - Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public. 

Four Big Ten Alumni

Four college alumni were climbing a mountain one day. Each was from a different Big Ten school and each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans at their Alma mater. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all. They continued to argue all the way up the mountain, and finally as they reached the top, the Boilermaker hurled himself off the mountain, shouting, "This is for Purdue!" as he fell to his doom.
Not wanting to be out done, the Wildcat threw himself off the mountain proclaiming, "This is for Northwestern!" Seeing this, the Buckeye walked over and shouted, "This is for everyone!!!" and pushed the Wolverine off the side of the mountain.