U.S. State Jokes - Texas Jokes

Texas Hooker

This guy was walking down a street in Texas and this hooker says, "Say, wanna have a good time? We do things in a big way down here in Texas."  "Sure," he says and they were off to the nearest motel.
She takes off her clothes and he keeps staring at her.  She says, "Is this the first pussy you seen since you crawled out of one?"  The guy says, "No, just the first one I've seen big enough to crawl back into."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Nurse Conversations

Several nurses on break in the Boston General cafeteria were discussing boyfriends, past and present. Suddenly, a nurse from New York City said, "Well, I have discovered men are all alike!" Whereupon, a pert little nurse from Dallas laughed and slapped the table. "Gal," she said, "men are all ah like, too!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Texas Plastic Surgeons

Three Texas plastic surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed. One of them said, "I'm the best plastic surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost 7 fingers in an accident, I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England." One of the others said. "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and legs in an accident, I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold medal in 5 field events in the Olympics." The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse's ass and a cowboy hat. Now he's president of the United States."

Anonymous
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