Maternity Ward

A Baptist, a Catholic, and a Mormon are in the maternity ward. The Baptist says, “One more son and I have a basketball team.”
The Catholic says, “That’s nothing, one more kid and I have a baseball team.”
The Mormon guy says, “That’s nothing, one more wife and I have a golf course.”

MLB Member Quotes

• "It was too bad I wasn't a second baseman; then I'd probably have seen a lot more of my husband." - Karolyn Rose, ex-wife of Pete Rose, 1981
• "It's a weird scene. You win a few baseball games and all of a sudden, you're surrounded by reporters and TV men with cameras asking you about Vietnam and race relations." - Vida Blue, 1971
• "I watch a lot of baseball on the radio." - Gerald Ford, 1978
• "It's a beautiful day for a night game." - Announcer Frankie Frisch
• "The most important things in life are good friends and a strong bull pen." - Pitcher Bob Lemon, 1981
• "Well, that kind of puts a damper on another Yankees win." - Announcer Phil Rizzuto, after a news bulletin reporting the death of Pope Paul VI, 1978.
• "They brought me up with the Brooklyn Dodgers, which at time was in Brooklyn." - Casey Stengel, 1962
• "I won't play for a penny less than $1500." - Honus Wagner, turning down an offer of $2000.

Louisville Slugger

Hey babe, I got a Louisville slugger... in my pants! High five!