Sexist Jokes - Private Parts

JokerZ offers a HUGE collection of funny dirty jokes. Check out our professionally curated categories for hilarious adult jokes and sex jokes. Set your filter on Risque and Uncensored to browse dirty knock-knock jokes, inappropriate jokes and one liners from professional joke writers. Over 3000 of the best dirty jokes will have you ROFL. Share jokes anonymously with friends or post on social sites.

Couples Honeymoon Night

A couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big night. The bride rolled over and said, "That was nice but tell me, what did my pussy look like before you rooted it?" The husband replied "Like a beautiful rose with drops of dew on it." "That's nice honey" she replied, "What did it look like after you rooted it?" "Like a bulldog eating porridge" the husband replied.

Categories: Sexist Jokes (About Women) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Ostrich & Pussy Cat

A man walked into a pub with an ostrich and a pussy cat.
He walked up the the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the ostrich, whiskey for the cat."
They found a table, sat down and drank their drinks. After they finished their drinks, it was the ostrich's turn to buy a round.
The ostrich walked up to the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the man, whiskey for the cat."
He took the drinks back to the table and they drank them. When it was the cat's turn to buy, he told them "Fuck off!"
So the man went back to the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the ostrich and whiskey for the cat."
The Barman was curious about this and said "I notice that you and the ostrich have both bought a round, but the cat hasn't. Why is this?".
The man replied, "I helped a little old lady across the road, and she turned out to be my Fairy Godmother. She granted me one wish."
"What did you wish for?" asked the Barman.
"I wished for a long legged bird with a tight pussy!"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Animal in Bar Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Animal Jokes (Bird Jokes) , Animal Jokes (Cat Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Ribbons

A man has a dog that snores in his sleep. Annoyed, because she can't sleep, his wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. A few hours after going to bed, the dog is snoring as usual. Finally, unable to sleep, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it around the dog's testicles, and sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed! Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring very loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps very soundly. The next morning, the husband wakes up very hung over. He tumbles into the bathroom to urinate. As he is standing in front of the toilet, he looks in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and, as he walks back into the bedroom, he notices a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head, looks down at the dog and says: "Boy, don't remember where we were or what we did, but, by God, we got first and second place!"

Categories: Sex Jokes (Private Parts) , Animal Jokes (Dog Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Hangover Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
Trackuser=No (Robot detected) |IsRobot=Yes |

Page rendered in 0.2203 seconds