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Sexist Jokes - About Women

Couples Honeymoon Night
A couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big night. The bride rolled over and said, "That was nice but tell me, what did my pussy look like before you rooted it?" The husband replied "Like a beautiful rose with drops of dew on it." "That's nice honey" she replied, "What did it look like after you rooted it?" "Like a bulldog eating porridge" the husband replied.
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New Drug
Did you here about the pharmaceutical company? They developed a new drug that, when administered to women, compels them to go join a convent and become a nun.
The FDA refused to license it, though. Seems it was habit-forming.
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My Car Is Shtolen!
An Irishman walks out of a pub, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you lad?" "Yesh, Shombody shtole me car!", the Irishman replies. The cop asks, "Well now, where was your car last time you saw it?" "It was at the end of this key." About this time the cop looks down to see that the Irishman's member is being exhibited for all to see. He then asks, "Are you aware that you are exposing yourself?" The Irishman looks down woefully and moans "OOH GOD... they got me girl too!"
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