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Sex Jokes
George In the Jungle
George of the Jungle lived all alone in the jungle with no other people. Since there were no other people, George had no one to have sex with and instead screwed a hole in a tree everyday. One day, he found a woman, an abandoned orphan like himself, in the jungle and the call to do the wild thing became too much. Soon, they were making out and getting pretty hot 'n' heavy -- until George kicked the woman in the crotch. "Why did you do that?" she exclaimed. "Must check for squirrels."
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Jewish Names
A widowed Jewish lady, still in good shape, was sunbathing on a mostly deserted beach at Stimson Beach. She looked up and noticed that a man her age, also in good shape, had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand near hers and began reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "How are you today?" "Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book. "I love the beach. Do you come here often?" she asked. "First time since my wife passed away two years ago," he replied and turned back to his book. "I'm sorry to hear that. My husband passed away three years ago and it is very lonely," she countered. "Do you live around here?" She asked. "Yes, I live over in San Francisco," he answered, and again he resumed reading. Trying to find a topic of common interest, she persisted, "Do you like pussy cats?" With that, the man dropped his book, came over to her blanket, tore off her swimsuit and gave her the most passionate lovemaking of her life. When the cloud of sand began to settle, she gasped and asked the man, "How did you know that was what I wanted?"
The man replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"
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Too Much Sex
One day a man took his wife to the doctor and says, "All she likes to do is do it. Can you help her?" The doctor replies, "Come back in an hour." The man leaves so the doctor can perform his treatment. One hour later the man returns to discover the doctor having sex with his wife. The man says, "What are you doing?!?" The doctor says, "Taking her temperature." The man replies, "When you pull that thing out it better have some numbers on it!"
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