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Name Please
This guy walks into a bar and two steps in realizes it's a gay bar, but decides, "What the heck, I really want a drink."
When the gay waiter approaches he says to the guy, "What's the name of your penis?"
Guy: Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink.
Waiter: I'm sorry, but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your penis. Mine for instance is called 'Nike" for the slogan 'Just Do It'. That guy down at the end of the bar calls his 'Snickers' because 'It Really Satisfies'.
The guy looks dumbfounded, so the waiter says he'll give him a couple of minutes to think it over. So the guy turns to the man on his left and asks, "Hey, bud, what's the name of your penis?"
Other customer: Timex!
First guy: Why Timex?
Other guy: Because it takes a lickin and keeps on tickin!
A little shaken, he turns to the guy on his right.
First guy: What's the name of your penis?
Second guy: Ford! Because quality is job #1! Have you driven a Ford lately?
Even more shaken, he thinks a little more and finally thinks of a name for his penis.
Guy: Bartender! The name of my penis is "Secret'!
Waiter: (pouring beer) Why 'Secret'?
Guy: (proudly) Because it's strong enough for a man, but made for a woman!
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Lesbians in a Canoe
Q: What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?
A: Fur traders.
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New Yorker Quit His Job
A business man from New York decided to quit his job and buy a 200 acre spread in Montana. One day while out riding his horse, he came across another man on horseback. The man told him he was his next door neighbor and he was having a get-together the coming weekend. He said: "I have to warn you though, there will be a lot of drinking at this party." The city slicker said no problem. "There will also be sex going on." No problem he responded. "Well, There will probably be some fighting too." I think I can handle myself, claimed the new neighbor. As he rode off, he turned and asked the party host. "By the way, what should I wear at the party" The man, responded "Oh, it don't matter, It's only going to be me and you!"
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