Jewish Mothers

Did you hear about the tramp who walked up to the Jewish mother on the street and said, "Lady, "I haven't eaten in three days?"  "Force yourself," she replied.

Rabbi and a Priest

The priest and the rabbi were on a plane flying across the ocean when the plane developed engine trouble. Everyone was doomed. The priest turned to the rabbi and said, "Before I die there's something that I would like to know. You being Jewish and all -- have you ever tasted ham?" "Well," the rabbi laughed, "Sure I've tasted ham. But tell me father, before we die -- could you tell me if you have ever made love to a woman?" The priest blushed and said, "There was this one time I gave in and made love to a woman." The rabbi looked at the priest and said, "Beats the hell out of ham, don't it?"

Desert Jews

Q: Why did the Jews wander in the desert for forty years?
A: Somebody dropped a shekel.