Religion Jokes - Catholic Jokes

The Vicar's Sunday Morning Walk

The new Vicar was up early one Sunday morning, walking around his new parish, after leaving his wife in bed with the Sunday papers, her cup of tea, and a pack of cigarettes. One of the old villagers came up to him and said, "Good morning Vicar, how be you and the wife?".  The Vicar said, "Good morning my man, I am fine, the wife is fine also, as I left her in bed smoking." The villager said, "Arr, Vicar, that's the way to fuck 'em!"

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Anonymous

False God Talk

People who talk about false gods are engaged in idol gossip.

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Anonymous

Two Irishmen Digging A Ditch

Two Irishmen were digging a ditch directly across from a brothel. Suddenly, they saw a rabbi walk up to the front door, glance around and duck inside. "Ah, will you look at that?" One ditch digger said. "What's our world comin' to when men of th' cloth are visitin' such places?" A short time later, a Protestant minister walked up to the door and quietly slipped inside. "Do you believe that?" The workman exclaimed. "Why, 'tis no wonder th' young people today are so confused, what with the example clergymen set for them." After an hour went by, the men watched as a Catholic priest quickly entered the whore house. "Ah, what a pity," the digger said, leaning on his shovel. "One of th' poor lasses must be ill."

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Anonymous
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