The Right Way to Ask a Question

A Jewish guy in a London hotel calls the operator and asks, in broken English with a heavy Lithuanian-Yiddish accent, for number 266418. A short time later, someone knocks and when he opens the door he sees 2 beautiful and sexy girls who asked him, "Have you ordered 2 shikses for one night"?

Jewish Mothers

Did you hear about the tramp who walked up to the Jewish mother on the street and said, "Lady, "I haven't eaten in three days?"  "Force yourself," she replied.

Calling A Meeting

The Pope calls a meeting of all the cardinals. When they have all assembled at the Vatican, he takes them into the meeting hall and states, "I have some really fantastic news and some very terrible news." Of course, all the cardinals want to hear the good news first, so the Pope tells them, "Jesus Christ has returned to the world. The time of judgement is at hand, and our faith in his existence is justified." After the commotion dies down a bit, one of the cardinals speaks up, asking what the terrible news is. The Pope replies, "He was calling from Salt Lake City."