Relationship Jokes - Marriage Jokes

Goofy

Mickey and Minnie have been having problems for some time now and after hearing of Barbie and Ken's break up, they too decide to call it quits. Donald goes to Mickey to console him and says, "She's been a problem since day one. I'm glad you finally saw that she's crazy." Mickey looks at Donald and replies, "No, I broke up with her because she's fucking goofy."

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Anonymous

Marriage Is...

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.
Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.
Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.
Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes.
Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.
Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.
Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings": The Engagement Ring, The Wedding Ring, The Suffe-Ring and The Endu-Ring.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Cockpit Talk

Two pilots, Rick and Dick, are flying when they start talking about the new flight attendant. Rick said, "Have you seen Svetlana, she's absolutely stunning." Dick replied, "Seen her? I already did her after a flight last week!" Rick said, "Wow man, was she good?" Dick replied, "Well she's not as good as other flight attendants but still better than my wife." So Rick said, "Well I gotta try this out."
So after the flight he gets a drink with Svetlana and one thing leads to another. The next flight Dick asks, "So, what did you think?"
Rick replied, "You're right, we do have hotter flight attendants, but she was definitely still better than your wife."

Anonymous
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