Polygamy And...

A child at a Christian school was studying the early days of Mormonism in his class. He wrote on his paper, "The early Mormons believed in having more than one wife; this is called polygamy. We believe in having only one wife, this is called monotony"

Upmanship

An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life. Italian: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild. Frenchman: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in chocolate, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild. Aussie: When I finish making love to my wife, I get out of bed and wipe my dick on the curtains, and my wife...she goes wild!

It's All About the Money

A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would there be any "we" in the first place."