Welcome Neighbor

A city guy buys a ranch. He sits on the porch of his new house taking in the fresh country air when a dusty truck pulls up. "Howdy, neighbor!" calls the man in the truck. " I came to invite you to a little Welcome to the Neighborhood party at my place tonight. " "Well, that's mighty fine of you," the city guy replies. "It's going to be great," the neighbor adds. "There's gonna be eatin', drinkin', fightin', and f**kin'!" "Sounds great," the city guy replies. "What should I wear?" "Aww, it don't matter," the neighbor says. "It's just gonna be you and me!"

Iowa Tractor Stop

Q: What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Iowa?
A: Prom.

You Might Be A Redneck If - Lard

You might be a redneck if you've ever used lard in bed.