Baby Sitting

Q: How do you babysit black kids?
A: Wet their lips and stick them to the wall!

Jewish Genie

This black guy is walking along a beach when he looks down a sees an antique lamp. Thinking that he'll get enough money for another vial of crack, he takes the lamp home and starts to clean it. He starts rubbing the lamp, when all of a sudden a Jewish genie appears, and being a Jewish genie, he say's to the black man that he has two wishes. The black guy thinks for a couple of seconds, and quickly says:, "I want to be white and surrounded by cunt. "In an instant he is turned into a tampon. Now the morale of this story is: Don't ever expect anything from a Jew without strings attached.

Looking for a Monkey Wrench

An old farmer is driving down a country road in his pickup truck when it starts making an awful noise. He stops the truck and crawls underneath to investigate the problem."Hmmm...muffler's loose. I bet I could fix that if I had a Monkey Wrench." He says.  He crawls out from underneath the truck and looks down the road. Off in the distance he sees a small house. There is a black woman and several small black children playing in the yard. The Farmer yells to her, "Hey Miss, do you happen to have a Monkey Wrench?"  "What?" She yells back.  "A Monkey Wrench!!?" He screams."What?"  "MONKEY WRENCH!!?...MONKEY WRENCH!!?"  "Naw, this ain't no Monkey Ranch, its a Day Care Center!"