Popular Jokes

These jokes are our most popular jokes over the past few months, based on all user feedback. Vote for your favorites today!

Move Your Cars Please.

It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the high school intercom:  "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing."
Twenty minutes later there was another announcement:  "Will the twelve hundred students who went to move 26 cars please return to class."

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Anonymous

Dictionary Spelling

How do you spell elephant? E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t" That's not how the dictionary spells it" "You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelled it!"

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Anonymous

Sunday Sermon

In Church on Sunday morning, the preacher was standing up at the pulpit preaching a sermon. After speaking for about 10 minutes he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd throw it in the river!"  Then he talked some more and a little while later he said, "If I had all the wine in the world, I'd throw it in the river!"  After that statement, he kept ranting and raving until about 15 minutes later when he said, "If I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd throw it in the river!"  Then he talked for a few more minutes and sat down. Then, the choir director stood up and with a sheepish smile on her face she said, "now will the congregation please stand and join us in singing hymn number 134, LET'S ALL GATHER AT THE RIVER!

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Anonymous
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