Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton

Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, "Bill, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautiful country, and on each house I saw a banner." "What did it say on the banners?" Clinton asks. Saddam replies, "Allah is god, god is Allah."
Clinton says, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever.  It had been rebuilt completely and on each house flew an enormous banner."  "What could you see on the banners?" Saddam asks. Clinton replies, "I don't know. I can't read Hebrew."

Bill Clinton Statue Committee

Bill Clinton Statue Committee 1040 Waffle Street Little Rock, Arkansas 72208
Dear Friend;

We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for the raising of $5,000,000.00 for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall of Fame in Washington, D.C. This committee was in a quandary as to where to place the statue. It was not wise to place it beside the statue of George Washington, who never told a lie, nor beside Jesse Jackson, who never told the truth, since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference. We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus, the greatest democrat of all. He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where he was, and returned not knowing where he had been. And he did it all on borrowed money. Over 3,000 years ago Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land." Nearly 3,000 years later Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses and light up a camel - this is the promised land." Now, Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovels, kick your asses, raise the price of camels and mortgage the promised land. If you are one of the fortunate people who has anything left after paying taxes, we expect a very generous contribution to the worth while project.
Fraternally, Bill Clinton Statue Committee
P.S. It is said that Bill Clinton is considering changing the Democratic Party emblem from a donkey to a condom, because it stands for inflation, halts productivity, covers up a bunch of pricks, and it gives a false sense of security.

Light Bulb - Liberal Democrats

Q: How many Liberal Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. "Well it's not really a question of should we change it or should we not change the lightbulb, but more a question of...(blah blah waffle)"