Light Bulb - Liberals

Q: How many liberals does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None: They can't remove the old ones since they are already part of the environment.

Jews Voting for President

I asked a Jew who he was going to vote for as president. He said, "Well, the last time Jews listened to a bush, they wandered in the desert for 40 years."

I Wanna Be A Commie

A man goes to the doctor for a checkup. After the checkup, the doctor tells the man he has bad news. "You only have six months to live." The man sits for a while thinking, and then says, "There's only one thing I can do, I'm going to become a Communist." The doctor asks, "You've been a patriotic American all your life, why are you going to become a Communist now?" The man says, "Better one of them should die than one of us!"