Getting Married

Jacob age 85, and Rebecca age 79 are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way go past a drugstore. Jacob suggests that they go in. He addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you the owner?" The pharmacist answers, "Yes."
Jacob: "Do you sell heart medication?"
Pharmacist: "Of course we do."
Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"
Pharmacist: "All kinds."
Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism?"
Pharmacist: "Definitely."
Jacob: "How about Viagra?"
Pharmacist: "Of course."
Jacob: "Medicine for memory?"
Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety."
Jacob: "What about vitamins and sleeping pills?"
Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
Jacob: "Perfect! We'd like to register here for our wedding gifts."

Four Old Ladies and the F Word

Q:  How do you get four old ladies to say the F word?
A:  Have the fifth one say.... BINGO!

Older Men

An old guy was in Costco the other day, pushing his shopping cart around when he collided with a young guy who was also pushing a cart. He said to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
The young guy says,  "That's OK. It's just a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate." The old guy said, "Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?"
The young guy says, " Well, she is 24 years old, tall, with long blond hair, green eyes, long legs, big boobs and she's wearing tight white shorts, a halter top and no bra.
What does your wife look like?" The old guy said, "Doesn't matter. Let's look for yours." Most older men are helpful like that.