Redneck Interview

You might be a redneck if... the interviewer asks:
Q: "Did you know that we are a Fortune 500 Company?"
A: "What track do y'all sponsor that race at? I ain't been to that one yet."

The Business One - Liners

• The bigger they are, the harder they hit.
• The book you spent $20.95 for today will come out in paperback tomorrow.
• The business plan you prepare must be a lie; but it must be a detailed and precise lie rather than a vague and general lie.
• The business world worships mediocrity.
• Officially, we revere free enterprise, initiative, and individuality. Unofficially, we fear it.
• The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
• The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uhh...
• The chance of a piece of bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
• The chaos in the universe always increases.
• The chief cause of problems is solutions.
• The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required on it. 

Important Notice

To make things easier for all of us, please notice this Important Notice About Notices... You may have noticed the increased number of notices for you to notice. We notice that some of our notices have been noticed. On the other hand, some of our notices have not been noticed. This is very noticeable. It is noticed that the responses to the notices have been noticeably unnoticeable. This notice is to remind you to notice the notices and respond to the Notices because we do not want the noticed to go unnoticed.