Zen Buddhist Buys a Hotdog

This Zen Buddhist Monk walks up to a hotdog stand and says to the vender, "Give me one with everything". So the vender makes him a hotdog with everything, and hands it to the Buddhist Monk. The Buddhist gives him a twenty dollar bill, the vender takes it, puts it in his cash register and shuts the door. The Buddhist says, "Wait, where's my change?" The vender replies, "Change must come from within".

Paybacks

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for a weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round-trip air ticket. If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home, offering his credit card numbers, his driver's license number and his address but to no avail. The cabbie said, "If you don't have $15, get the hell out of my cab." So the businessman was forced to hitch hike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight. One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab back to the airport. Well, who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity and he hit on a plan. The businessman got in the first cab in the line. "How much for a ride to the airport?" he asked. "Fifteen bucks," came the reply. "And how much for you to give me a blow job on the way?" "What?!! Get the hell out of my cab!" The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result. When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked, "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabbie replied, "Fifteen bucks." The businessman said "OK" and off they went. Then, as they drove slowly past the long line of cabs, the businessman gave a big smile and thumbs-up sign to each driver.

Knock Knock - Iowa

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Iowa!
Iowa who?
Iowa you a dollar!