Surgeon and Plumber

A plumber attended to a leaking faucet at a neurosurgeon's house. After a 2-minute job, he demanded $75. "I don't charge this amount even though I'm a surgeon." "You're right -- that's why I switched from surgery to plumbing!"

Opposite Characteristics

Two bachelors were talking about their respective choice of life partner. One friend said, "It is generally said that people with opposite characteristics make the happiest marriages. What is your opinion?" The friend replied, "Yes, they are right. That is why I am looking for a girl with money!"

Yo Mama - Steal

Yo mama so poor, when I visited her trailer, two cockroaches tripped me and a rat tried to steal my wallet.